Dear Google,
HELP!
I realize that an open operating system means taking the good with the bad, and carrier customization is inevitable. Their primary reason for being in the mobile phone business is to rape their customers make money, and they’re going to want to add their apps that offer paid content and services. We’re in dire need of some control over their implementation though, to prevent stuff from happening like AT&T Navigator running constantly. I was amazed how much of their crap is set up to launch automatically, just using resources for no reason. I’m obviously a big proponent of rooting, but you really shouldn’t HAVE to modify your phone to make it run well, especially when the hardware is more than capable.
A good start would be some basic standards to which carriers have to adhere in order to call the OS “Android”. They can still add all their bloatware, but how about making all additions to the ROM install to the data partition? Can we also set some standards for recovery and system images? It’s infuriating to own multiple android phones and need multiple drivers and file formats to be able to flash a rom or restore to stock or do a factory reset. The built in method used on the Nexus One is beautiful in it’s simplicity and flexibility. Why not make it THE way to issue updates and restore?
We’ve also seen that the carriers will concede to manufacturers in the case of the iPhone, they just need some prodding, and the manufacturers are making tons of money on a free operating system, they’ll certainly concede a few minor things like that.
Dear Android Phone Manufacturers,
Stop it.
Seriously, stop screwing around with Android. Your modifications are pretty much universally hated. I’m looking at you, Samsung. How much did you pay a team of software engineers to make Android run so poorly? If I had gone from an iPhone 3GS to a Galaxy S, without first having used a phone with unmolested Android, I would have thrown that pile of AIDS and fail into a river, and ordered an iPhone 4.
Did no one at Samsung have a Nexus One for comparison? You had to have noticed that after you “fixed” Android, the Nexus One just completely raped it in every way, despite having slower hardware. Did you notice it, and just figure no one would care? Did you think that people would really appreciate the colored boxes around their app icons and the horizontal app drawer so much they would overlook the fact that their phone took a good 3-5 seconds to respond when you tapped on one of those pretty icons to open an application?
And what the hell did you do to the recovery process? Was the phone based system that used the neat, all encompassing update.zip just too easy? Did you really need to incorporate the Windows only (Some of us use other OSes, btw. You know, Unix based systems?) KIES bullshit? Seriously? I need to download 4 or 5 files totaling near 500MB, boot to a windows partition or make a virtual machine, and install your horrid drivers in order to do the same thing any other Android device can do with a 100MB update.zip and no computer? Brilliant, thanks for the innovation.
I want all of you to be locked in a room with a box of Galaxy S phones and a box of laptops from a variety of manufacturers and beaten mercilessly until you get all the phones in download mode with the correct drivers installed on the laptops. I hope you all have your affairs in order.
HTC almost gets a pass on this, in that their Sense skin actually does make some appreciable changes that some people actually prefer, but I still take issue with the depth of integration. They could easily make Sense more modular, making it easier for users to set their phone up however they like (you know, the reason they went with an Android device in the first place?), and easier for HTC to stay on top of the rapidfire progress of Android.
On principle alone, Motorola needs to be beaten with the corpses of the Samsung guys for the bullshit bootloader lock. What the fuck is the point? I paid for it, can I please, please do whatever the hell I want with it now? In the words of Sgt. Hartman, “Do you mind if I be in charge for a while? Thank you very much!”.
I don’t even see the logic here. We’re always going to win. You’re never going to lock us out. We’ll always get around it. It comes down to this: People who want to hack their phone will. No matter what you do. The vast majority of your customers will never do any major modifications. Is it really worth spending the time and money on a complex bootloader to try to keep people from modifying something they paid good money for? Why not make things easier on everyone, include a Nexus One style “Your Warranty Will Be Voided” message, and be done with it. I just saved you millions of dollars in software development man hours, you’re welcome.
In short, can someone please, PLEASE tell me why you are spending so much money developing software that makes the Android OS slower, less responsive, larger, and harder to use?
Dear Carriers,
You can basically just read the manufacturer section and pick the parts that apply to you. Oh don’t play dumb, you know which parts apply.
I realize that you are in the business of screwing people out of as much money as possible while providing just the minimum required service providing mobile phone service, and I realize that you see your horrible, terrible, AIDS infested pus oozing diseased abortions you so amusingly call “extras” apps for paid content as another income stream, but you’re also wasting your time and money trying to force these apps on us.
The same argument about Motorola locking the bootloader applies here; if the customer actively wants your suckware app off their phone, they’re gonna get rid of it. Just install it to /data like a normal app, so people can just get rid of it without having to root. No one is going to go “WELL, I CAN’T REMOVE THIS FAIL APP, SO I GUESS I’LL JUST SIGN UP FOR IT, LOL!”, the idea that trying to require it to be on the phone will make more people use it is absolutely absurd. The people that want to use it will use it, and won’t try to remove it. The people that want to remove it clearly don’t want to use it. Use your fucking heads a little, I know it doesn’t come naturally, because it’s just so goddamn rare with you guys, but try real hard this time.
Thanks for your time guys, now try to get your shit together, because some guy on the internet said so!